1337 WWII

I edited it a bit for BF1942. It's still stupid, but a little better.

?7:42PM? <Waxx> "WWII for the 1337"
?7:42PM? <Waxx> Hitler is talking to these people
?7:42PM? <Waxx> and he's like
?7:43PM? <Waxx> "ph34r, i r 1337"
?7:43PM? <Waxx> and they are all like, "omgz k"
?7:43PM? <Waxx> thus, hitler rises to power in germany
?7:43PM? <Waxx> now
?7:43PM? <Waxx> the british and french are like "wtf"
?7:43PM? <Waxx> so they talk to him
?7:43PM? <Waxx> and they're like "d00d wtf r u doing"
?7:43PM? <Waxx> now
?7:44PM? <Waxx> well
?7:44PM? <Waxx> we'll skip in the middle
?7:44PM? <Waxx> September 1st, 1939
?7:44PM? <Waxx> Hitler invades poland
?7:44PM? <Waxx> the polish are like "omg wtf"
?7:44PM? <Waxx> and the germans are like "lol baserape"
?7:44PM? <Waxx> polish are like "wtf ghey"
?7:44PM? <Waxx> and then the germans pwn them all
?7:44PM? <Waxx> poland falls to the germans
?7:45PM? <Waxx> next they march through belgium to go around the maginot line
?7:45PM? <Waxx> the french thought they were safe with that maginot line, but unfortunately the germans jumped over it
?7:45PM? <Waxx> anyhow
?7:45PM? <Waxx> with hitler marching through neutral belgium, the british are like "u guyz r ghey im just having a bad game"
?7:45PM? <Waxx> eventually, hitler gets through poland and attacks france, bypassing the maginot line
?7:45PM? <Waxx> the french are like "omg haxxorza"
?7:46PM? <Waxx> and the germans are, again, like "lol no hack fear us lol"
?7:46PM? <Waxx> France falls
?7:46PM? <Waxx> Britain now becomes involved in active combat against the germans
?7:46PM? <Waxx> now, there are about 300,000 british and french soldiers on the beaches of dunkirk
?7:47PM? <Waxx> and the germans are coming, they're all like "ahaha we pwn yuo noobs"
?7:47PM? <Waxx> and winston churchill says "lolno"
?7:47PM? <Waxx> then, to his surprise, the germans begin a bombing campaign on the british
?7:47PM? <Waxx> then churchill wasl like "omfg plane campers"
?7:47PM? <Waxx> all the men on the mainland then said "wtf get out of radar station i want to use it b4 i tk u"
?7:48PM? <Waxx> anyway
?7:48PM? <Waxx> things are quiet until hitler decides he'd like to invade russia
?7:48PM? <Waxx> so, he does
?7:48PM? <Waxx> the russians are like "OMG WTF D00DZ, STOP TKING"
?7:48PM? <Waxx> and the germans are still like "omg ph34r n00bz"
?7:48PM? <Waxx> the russians fall back, all the way to moscow
?7:48PM? <Waxx> and then comes the russian winter
?7:49PM? <Waxx> the germans are like "omg ghey wall hacxors plz stop"
?7:49PM? <Waxx> now, the russians are like "lol stfu"
?7:49PM? <Waxx> and so, the russians begin pushing the germans out of the soviet union
?7:49PM? <Waxx> so there you have it in europe
?7:49PM? <Waxx> but what's happening in the pacific?
?7:50PM? <Waxx> now
?7:50PM? <Waxx> japanese relations with the US had been deteriorating
?7:50PM? <Waxx> in fact, the japanese bought scrap metal off us up until a few days before pearl harbor
?7:50PM? <Waxx> the US was just like "lol ok"
?7:51PM? <Waxx> and the japs were like "kthx"
?7:51PM? <Waxx> suddenly, on december 7th, the japanese attack pearl harbor, hawaii
?7:51PM? <Waxx> the americans are like "FUCKING BASE CAMPERS"
?7:51PM? <Waxx> and the japanese, like their german allies, are all "lol stfu"
?7:51PM? <Waxx> seeing as the US had not developed proper weapons yet, they were unable to repel the onslaught
?7:52PM? <Waxx> roosevelt orders immediate building of one aircraft carrier for the entire war, and war is declared upon the empire of japan
?7:52PM? <Waxx> the japanese were very powerful
?7:53PM? <Waxx> so the us suffered a string of defeats
?7:53PM? <Waxx> until an obscure island known as midway becomes a very pivotal point on the map
?7:53PM? <Waxx> the japanese sent out a 1337 battle fleet to take and occupy midway
?7:54PM? <Waxx> the americans, though, knew the japanese code
?7:54PM? <Waxx> and learned of the plot
?7:54PM? <Waxx> so they sent out some ships
?7:54PM? <Waxx> the japanese began their attack on midway
?7:55PM? <Waxx> they immediately were like "WUT R THESE PLAENS AND SHIPS DOIGN HERA I SHOOTDOWN"
?7:55PM? <Waxx> the americans are now like "lol i shoot ur landing crafts"
?7:55PM? <Waxx> they now had midway, and sunk four front line japanese aircraft carriers, a major defeat for the japanese
?7:56PM? <Waxx> from this point on, the japanese would be playing a defensive battle for the rest of the war
?7:56PM? <Waxx> now, back to europe
?7:56PM? <Waxx> the year is now 1944
?7:56PM? <Waxx> the US 8th air force has been pwning the german industry by the air for some time now
?7:56PM? <Waxx> the british have been pwning them at night
?7:57PM? <Waxx> eisenhower feels that it is time to stage the attack on fortress europe
?7:57PM? <Waxx> and thus, on june 6, 1944, operation overlord commenced
?7:58PM? <Waxx> the germans were like "wtf fog hack, plz ban", because we had tricked them into believing the landing sites would be at calaise, far from the actual landing zones
?7:58PM? <Waxx> still, they put up a very 1337 fight
?7:58PM? <Waxx> rommel had wanted to use his panzer divisions to drive the allies into the sea
?7:58PM? <Waxx> but hitler was like "lol no ur ghey, panzer is 2 slow"
?7:59PM? <Waxx> because of this, the allies were able to establish a beachhead and begin landing their massive amounts of war materiel
?7:59PM? <Waxx> after the beaches, facing the allies were many large bushes called bocage
?7:59PM? <Waxx> crisscrossing the french countryside
?8:00PM? <Waxx> the germans camped in them, with lots of snip0rz in a windmill
?8:00PM? <Waxx> they were told to wait in tanks, but instead they were like "ROFL STFU I GO SNIPE WE WIN GAEM"
?8:01PM? <Waxx> when the germans saw tanks passing right by them, they were like "u use aimbot wtf!!!!11@"
?8:01PM? <Waxx> the americans were like "lol"
?8:01PM? <Waxx> though the fight was still tough, and many allied tanks and men were lost
?8:02PM? <Waxx> but the germans would not be lasting much longer
?8:02PM? <Waxx> with 1337 allied air cover now completely pwning the skies, they could now concentrate on close air support
?8:02PM? <Waxx> the germans now got to experience this on the receiving end
?8:02PM? <Waxx> needless to say, they were all going "BG BG BG"
?8:03PM? <Waxx> with the russians having pushed the germans completely out of their homeland, the end was near for the third reich
?8:03PM? <Waxx> soon the allies reached the rhine river
?8:03PM? <Waxx> the germans, crafty as ever, blew up all the bridges across
?8:03PM? <Waxx> except one
?8:03PM? <Waxx> then some allies in some jeepz ran across it
?8:03PM? <Waxx> the germans were like "STOP HACKING I TELL ADMIN"
?8:04PM? <Waxx> the allies had entered germany itself
?8:04PM? <Waxx> much fighting ensued, and eventually they reached berlin after much pwnage being dealt from both sides
?8:04PM? <Waxx> the russians, vengeful as ever, were allowed to enter berlin first
?8:04PM? <Waxx> where they proceeded to pwn everything, no matter what in hell it was
?8:05PM? <Waxx> hitler comes to his senses and goes "WTF POPUP!!@E I WOULD HAVE WON I HAET THIS"
?8:05PM? <Waxx> he and his mistress commit suicide in an underground bunker deep in germany
?8:05PM? <Waxx> the war in europe is over.
?8:06PM? <Waxx> meanwhile in the pacific.....
?8:06PM? <Waxx> with the americans having dealt a major blow to the japanese at midway, they press their luck further
?8:06PM? <Waxx> they begin pwning islands
?8:06PM? <Waxx> island after island falls
?8:06PM? <Waxx> iwo jima falls
?8:06PM? <Waxx> okinawa falls
?8:07PM? <Waxx> not wanting to risk the insanely high casualty rate of an invasion of japan, the president decides to drop two atomic bombs
?8:07PM? <Waxx> the japanese surrender
?8:07PM? <Waxx> world war two is over
?8:07PM? <Waxx> everyone goes home and gets laid
?8:07PM? <Waxx> the end
?8:08PM? <Waxx> with that, gentlemen, i bid you good night