Excerpts from your Pets Journal

Off topic, but don't go too far overboard - after all, we are watching...heh.
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Excerpts from your Pets Journal

Postby Ryan » Sat Mar 06, 2004 1:07 am

Thought this was cute.. lol.

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary

Day number 180

8:00 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 am - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 am - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
11:30 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
12:00 noon - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 pm - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
4:00 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
5:00 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 pm - Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!

Day number 181

8:00 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 am - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 am - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
11:30 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
12:00 noon - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 pm - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
4:00 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
5:00 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 pm - Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!

Day number 182

8:00 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9:30 am - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
9:40 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
10:30 am - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
11:30 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
12:00 noon - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
1:00 pm - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
1:30 pm - ooooooo. bath. bummer.
4:00 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
5:00 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5:30 pm - Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!

Excerpts from a Cat's Diary

Day 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling
objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat
dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and
the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of
furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

Day 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their
feet while they were walking almost s! ucceeded, must try this at the
top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile
oppressors, I
once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair ... must try
this on their bed.

Day 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in
attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to
strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a
good little cat I was ... Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

Day 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good
reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a
burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent
such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck
between my teeth.

Day 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was
placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the
noise and smell the fou! l odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More
importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of
"allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

Day 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe
snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to
return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got
to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he
reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his
safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time ...

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Postby Camel toe joe » Sat Mar 06, 2004 2:45 am

Oh man that made me crack up, I miss my kitty :( every evil Genius needs a kitty :(

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Postby Bossman » Sat Mar 06, 2004 10:20 am

:rotflmao:
Image

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Postby Chacal » Sat Mar 06, 2004 7:20 pm

Good one! :)
Chacal


[SIZE="1"][color="LightBlue"]Reporter: "Mr Gandhi, what do you think of western civilization?"
Gandhi: "I think it would be a great idea."[/color][/SIZE]

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Postby Slaughter » Sun Mar 07, 2004 12:31 am

hehehe, I should write a day in the life of Bella Bean my dog

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