Mort's joke of the week

Off topic, but don't go too far overboard - after all, we are watching...heh.
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Postby B » Mon Jul 17, 2006 8:52 am

Must not love em to much to wanna use them for suicide car bombings.

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Postby Alofwar » Mon Jul 17, 2006 11:04 am

Actually they are very hard to destroy, they are easy to repair and maintain, so they use them to mount machine guns.
"Don't mention the war"

German Tourist: Will you stop mentioning the war

Basil: Well you started it

German tourist: No we didn't

Basil: Yes you did, you invaded Poland

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Postby Ldsmith104 » Thu Jul 20, 2006 12:51 am

The day Microsoft builds something that doesn't suck is they day they start building vacuum cleaners
Larry

Damn it Jim!!! I'm a paramedic not a doctor!!!

Drive carefully or I'll see you naked
"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people."
-Eleanor Roosevelt
Originally posted by Chacal
There's no forum setting for allowing only mature posters.
Sad.

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Assume the position

Postby B » Mon Aug 07, 2006 11:27 pm

New sign we will be seeing very soon..

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Postby Sabres » Tue Aug 08, 2006 1:03 am

fuck gasoline...

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Postby =ender= » Tue Aug 08, 2006 6:39 am

Originally posted by Sabres
fuck gasoline...


I don't know what it is, but I laughed my ass off when I read this.

Nice pic, MsB.
Move as a team, never move alone. Welcome to the Terrordome!

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Postby Alofwar » Wed Aug 09, 2006 5:28 pm

Recently the British government brought in laws preventing the smacking of children. Many of the people against the bill were argueing that its the only language they understand.

But isnt that foreigners?
"Don't mention the war"

German Tourist: Will you stop mentioning the war

Basil: Well you started it

German tourist: No we didn't

Basil: Yes you did, you invaded Poland

Image

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Postby B » Wed Aug 09, 2006 7:36 pm

:D

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Postby Stl Lunatic » Wed Aug 09, 2006 7:39 pm

What the hell is Bangkok anyways? I think it's a country?

Wow...Where do you find random pictures like that B...lol...

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Postby cavalierlwt » Wed Aug 09, 2006 7:48 pm

Originally posted by Alofwar
Recently the British government brought in laws preventing the smacking of children. Many of the people against the bill were argueing that its the only language they understand.

But isnt that foreigners?


Hmmm, the counter to that, a law that allows you to smack children AND foreigners.......
Could be nirvana!
Failing to plead
with a throat full of dust
Life falls asleep
in a fetal position.

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Postby B » Wed Aug 09, 2006 7:56 pm

It was an email from wTh|Silgan. I always get stuff like that. I have a raunchy sense of humor. :)

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Postby Sabres » Thu Aug 10, 2006 11:37 am

Bangkok is the capital of Thailand I believe.

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Postby B » Thu Aug 17, 2006 7:13 am

Edge Designs is an all-women run company that designs interior office
space. They had a recent opportunity to do an office project in NYC.
The client allowed the women of this company a free hand in all
design aspects. The client was a company that was also run by all
women execs.............The result.........well.....We all know that men
never talk .never look at each other....and never laugh much in the
restroom.... The men's room is a serious and quiet place......
.....But now...with the addition of one mural on the wall......lets
just say the men's restroom is a place of laughter and smiles...

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Postby Sabres » Thu Aug 17, 2006 11:27 am

:rotflmao:

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Postby Ldsmith104 » Fri Aug 18, 2006 10:50 am

20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity
(and a warning that if you see me doing any one of these things, just laugh with me - or join in!)

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don t use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile.
Larry

Damn it Jim!!! I'm a paramedic not a doctor!!!

Drive carefully or I'll see you naked
"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people."
-Eleanor Roosevelt
Originally posted by Chacal
There's no forum setting for allowing only mature posters.
Sad.

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